
My first book! – Coming soon.

I wanna make myself proud
I wanna do it, I wanna do it all
I wanna touch, I wanna touch the sky
I wanna make it happen, make it happen
I wanna do the wonders
I wanna make mama proud
I wanna see the tears of joy
I wanna see her smile
I wanna try every time I’ll fall
I wanna climb all those stairs of success
that I’ve dreamt under my pillow
I wanna be the star
that I’ve promised my teddy pillow
I’ wanna trip, I’ll prolly mess up
But I wanna try again
I wanna fall
but I wanna run too, I wanna be in the race
I wanna fail
but I wanna get up and catch on the luck’s sale
I wanna do it, I wanna do it all
I wanna make it happen, I wanna make people awe
I will try
I will fall
but I’ll get up
and I will touch the sky
I will set the standards
I’ll make a history
I wanna be read
I wanna be told
I wanna be remembered
I wanna be an iodol
I wanna be lived
even after death!
Hoping for days where sparrows chirps makes me dance all over again
Waiting for days where orange skyline, dusk times excites me like they used to at one point in time
Looking for days where rain drops makes me look up into the sky like a dreamer chasing the dreams
Wishing for days where blooming flowers makes me capture my moments with spring borns.
Looking forward to all those days where making me happy was a lot easier, where laughters were really hearty, where smiles were spontenous, where heart trouble was less, where sadness was non existent, where satisfying, fulfulling was much easier, unlike today
Waiting, hoping, wanting the better days to come, to start a new!
The dove mornings with stomach cramps
After those cramped up nights on grey couch
Finding answers to heart rending moments
Moments that keeps on adding to life’s routine
Why am I chosen for such hurting life
Is there any test I’m supposed to pass
But how long it’ll take to end the misery
What grade I need to pass it all, end it all for forever
Is this possible to get through this
Am I doing it all right
Or is just a life’s struggle
We’re all required to suffer!
Those screams of cowardly hopeless soul
The tears of brutally broken self
Begs life to alter the side of story
Begs life to colour the faded canvas
Begs life to mark stops to the gut wrenching climax
Begs life to gift life! π₯π«
Those secretive self talks
Those night time reminiscences
Those moments of fulfillment
Those tears of remembrance
That wet pillow buddy
The teady feels and warmth of love
And those hours of solace
Peace!
Those breathless tears
Those depth less talks
Those numb movements
Those empty stares
Those made up laughter
Those wilted emotions
Like a needle injecting doses of grief
Like a rope tightening the bits of bliss
Like a poison infusing attacks of air hunger
Like a rods hitting the doors of emotions
Like a blade cutting deep into the ocean of self
And then life slaps you with undeniably harsh facts that you, knowingly deny to avoid unveiling of the unfulfilling emotions of peace and love.
In hopes to stay alive
In hopes to stay numb
In hopes to stay quite
In hopes to keep going
Blogging on a variety of things that pluck at the hearts' emotions & more
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with John W. Howell
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From the Existential to the Mundane - From Poetry to Prose
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Blogging, Motivation, Lifestyle and much more.
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HOW TO LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE AS A MOTHER AND WIFE WITHOUT FEAR! I can only describe my self seven years ago as broken. I left a bad marriage with crazy debt, two suitcases and a four year old. I didn't know who I was, where I fit in the world and where to start building a life for myself and my family. I went on a long, somewhat detoured at times, journey. I gathered information all over the internet from recipes to Self-help, read my heart out and here I am now wanting to share my experiences and knowledge base with you...my extended family. WE GOT THIS!!!